Hi everyone, remember me? It’s only been like what, three weeks since my last post but who’s counting right? To be honest real life has finally come and hit me square in the face and I’ve had to come to terms with what I can realistically do.
For the past year and a half I have enjoyed the luxury of being a “stay-at-home-mom”. It wasn’t always easy and there were days I wished it was me going to work instead of my husband. There are some people with the misconception that being a “stay-at-home-mom” means sitting at home all day and doing whatever you want (I know because I used to be one of them). However, this couldn’t be any farther from the truth! There is always a diaper to change, laundry to do, errands to run, and meals to cook. Then you have those occasional days when your children demand all of your, time, attention, and energy. It is at the end of days like that when I’d gladly trade my husband jobs.
Now that my husband is in school full time with a demanding schedule, it looks like my wish has come true. I’ve been greatly blessed to find a wonderful job that will allow me to provide for my family while my husband finishes school, but it has been a rough adjustment for all of us. I hope to one day find a good balance in my new situation, but for now I feel confused, guilty, and torn. Over the past year and a half my role has been to be a mother. I was fortunate enough to be able to stay at home and devote all my time to taking care of my baby and the home. It too was a rough adjustment at first but I came to find great joy in it. While becoming a mom is by far the greatest thing I’ve ever done, it has also been the hardest. It wasn’t always necessarily the sleepless nights or the 24/7 care that a baby requires that was hard but finding my own identity within being a wife and a mother. I can honestly say that since having my baby I have come to find myself.
While being a mother and a homemaker is still a major role in my life (and the most important), I am now having to take on the role of provider, at least until my husband is done with school. It is a sacrifice I agreed to and am willing to make to help my husband fulfill his goals, but it certainly doesn’t make leaving my baby any easier. Since I started working a little over two weeks ago my time at home seems much more precious. With less time at home and more time away from my family I’ve been struggling to balance and prioritize my life. I’ve been force to really ask myself what things are most important and what things are not. In order to determine this I decided to make a list of what my underlying goals and priorities are in life. Here is my list:
1. Be an attentive mother.
2. Fall more in love with my husband everyday.
3. Continue to build my relationship with my Father in Heaven and act in His will.
4. Remain true to who I am and what I love.
These basic yet profound lifelong goals are what influence my daily actions and priorities. With all this being said, I also love blogging and am determined to continue what I began only four short months ago. I may not be posting as often (hopefully more often than every three weeks) but I hope you’ll continue to follow and enjoy my adventures in life as a working mom, wife, seamstress and blogger!